Running With Scissors

“I often times struggle with being patient, seeking perspective and enduring. I have rushed forward without much awareness… to fix or at least make better. Slowly I am putting the scissors down and standing still - then moving with lovingkindness.”

Running with scissors.

Something my parents always taught me NOT to do. “You’ll hurt yourself.” Was the common reasoning. It makes sense, of course. Sharp objects flying around in haste and hurry. We are taught at an early age how to protect ourselves.

What I later learned in life, is that running with scissors also harms others. It’s tragic for all involved, really. You see, scissors are a wonderful tool to cut away. A instrument for removing the “thing” that you don’t want. Separate that which is not meant to be there. Or to divide in two. But, to be running forward, or in many cases…running in circles, not only can you harm yourself in the process, but often you hurt those around you as well.

I often times struggle with being patient, seeking perspective and enduring. In the past, I have easily rushed forward without much awareness… to fix or at least make better. Slowly I’ve learned to put the scissors down and stand still - then move with lovingkindness.

Over the last several years, I’ve seen this happen in my life. I became acutely aware that my response to mend, patch, fix…was not as productive as I’d hoped for. I needed to take a step back. This has taken a lot of self control. Fear and anger can cause you to not think clearly. This I’ve known well.

I’m at the beginning of a two year journey of mindfulness training. A program designed to help bring me even closer to self awareness, deeply connect to the present and discover the awakening of my own heart. In return, my heart mends and my prayer is the world around me will heal a little as well.

Slow down, take a breath.

This is the practice of noticing not just what you feel, but where you feel it. Have deep compassion for yourself. You’ve come a long way, baby!

So, stop. Put the scissors down (slowly) and take a breath. Practice not running to fix misunderstandings, the scuffs on the floor, conflicts, the zipper, the broken relationship, all the things. Pause to notice how you feel. Out of control? Okay. You are allowed to feel that way. And when the time is right, when you’ve found clear understanding of the present moment - move again, with ease, with love and with compassion.